aosid's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- - i always feel a little silly when i wake up and read about my crises. like maybe i mistake simple fatigue for inadequacy or fear of abandonment or whatever. when i open my eyes at the right time, the walls are just walls and i'll be living the way i want to soon enough. i'm alone in my bed because that's just the way it's going to be for a little while. the night wants me to stop breathing and sink but i set this year aside for treading water. i love the promise of a clear dawn. yesterday i laid out plans to start running again when my friend gets back from japan. it's crazy - i hate running - but i planned it and i'll do it because i like the part of me who thinks that way. but the part who overanalyzes silence and loneliness and only the worst things? he's a douche but he usually falls asleep around now. 1:25 p.m. - 2013-03-12 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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